January's Guide to the Reader Insert - Updated

fan fic·tion

noun

noun: fanfiction

1. fiction written by a fan of, and featuring characters from, a particular TV series, movie, etc.

Introduction:  Fanfiction for daaaayz~

Reader-Inserts, no matter how stupid/desperate they may sound, are an art.  At this point, people should stop complaining about how weird it is for a fangirl/boy to put themselves with an anime character, but please!  Deal with it.  

I think that, whether people like it or not, Reader-chan is a character as much as any canon character is.  Same for Original Characters.  (OC’s)  So, they deserve to be treated like one.  

DISCLAIMER!  I, (author-chan) in no way, shape or form know what I am writing.  In this case, I know as much as you (clueless reader-chan) do.  I’m merely compiling all the data and opinions I have on the topic in an incredibly stupid, weird file.  Yay!

Part 1:  Types of Fics

There are lots of different fanfictions out there for the aspiring fangirl/boy.  In all honesty, it’s hard to keep track of all of them.  So, to feel useful for once and distract myself from the fact that I have no life, I made this helpful list!

Want to see your favorite character doing something a bit… different?  What about a café owner Levi Ackerman, or a rock star England?  Well then, the Alternate Universe Fic is for you!  The Alternate Universe Fic can usually be seen in the popular form of AU, which stands for, you guessed it, Alternate Universe.  AU Fics put the chosen character into a different universe than canon does.  What would Edward Elric be like if he existed in everyday, modern world?  Or how about L in the land of Attack on Titan?

Popular Examples of an Alternate Universe Fic:

• Gakuen AU:  Your cast is in a school!  Usually the school’s name is ironic and/or funny (AoT:  Survey Corps High, Titan High; Hetalia: Hetalia High)  A popular grade to place these characters in is highschool, Sometimes other characters join the mix- Teachers stay teachers, arch enemies remain arch enemies, and allies remain allies.

• Café AU:  For some reason, Café Au’s are extremely popular.  I’m not gonna complain though- I like them!  Most times the chosen characters and reader-chan are complete strangers, often meeting by chance.

• Crossover AU:  So fun to read, so hard to write!  Crossover AU’s put one cast into the world of another, usually with the same plot.  The two characters of both animes are often interacting as well.

Can’t resist those classic love stories?  Then you’ll love the Cliché Fic!  At the end of every Cliché Fic, the guy gets the girl, and all problems are solved with a kiss.  Yay!  Actually, now thinking about it, basically all fics are Cliché fic’s.  Oh well!  May I note that if there is tension in the Cliche Fic, it is most likely because reader-chan and character-chan are opposites, really. 

Examples of a Cliché Fic:

• Bully Cliché: Usually, at least one of the characters are a bully, or the bullied.  Most of the time though, reader-chan is bullied and the character is the bully.  At the end, everybody is forgiven, and reader-chan and the character kiss and make up.

• Best Friend Cliché: Best Friends Forever!  Right?  Well, actually at the end of a best friend Cliché, reader-chan and the character realize that they’re meant to be much more.

• Drunk Cliché:  Uh oh, somebody got drunk…  And reader-chan’s got to help them.  In their stupor, the character usually admits their love for reader-chan.  Sometimes it’s the other way around too.  Drunk Clichés are fun in the sense that you get to make your favorite character do stupid things.  

Love a song so much that you NEED to have it in a fic?  Call in the Song Fic!  Song Fics are great in the fact that author-chan has no say in the plot…  The song is god.

I can’t really give examples, but, uh, I’ll make up my own…

• Literal Song:  A fic that takes a song seriously...  Maybe too seriously.  Oh, Miley Cyrus says she’s swinging on the wreckingball?  Huehuehue… Alright then!  Sebastian!!!  I need you for something!

• Figurative Song:  A fic that uses a song to get a deeper meaning across.  These song fics are much harder to write…  As author-chan needs to come up with a plot that is relevant to the song’s deeper meaning.  Great.

Sh*t will be lost.  Monsters will be born.  Order your Crack Fic if you want a fanfiction that either makes no sense, makes you laugh your butt off, or calls for an epic facetable.

Examples of Crack Fics:

• Drunk Crack:  When a character does stupid things because they’re drunk.  Reader-chan usually facepalming at the side or dying of laughter.  Unfortunately, it’s rare that any actual romance is included, unless character-chan gets super pervy  >.>

• Reference Crack:  A crack fic rife with references, which apparently makes it funny.  Not available because I suck at references (and there are tons of references in all my other fics as well).

Part 2:  Length of a Fic

Fanfictions, like much other pieces of writing, varies in length.  I honestly have no idea why I included this part in my explanation, but they are necessary for commissions (which kinda answers why I included this part…  //facetable).

• Oneshot:  Oneshots are short, sweet little pieces of gold that usually cause the reader (whoever they may be) to explode with fangirly-ness.  The reason for this is because of their short length, oneshots have a very high concentration of cuteness.  Imagine this.  The average fanfiction has 3 oz of sugar (cuteness) in it.  Now, the average fanfiction is a 16 oz glass.  It’s sweet, but not overwhelmingly so.  A onceshot is a 5 oz glass.  Now, that’s a lot of sugar in a small amount of water.  Ouch.

        Another thing with oneshots is that they’re so difficult to write…  lately I discovered that I prefer fanfictions that build on reader-              chan’s character, because reader-chan is the main character, of course.  Building character in a page and a half plus including 3 oz           of sugar is freaking hard.

• Average Length:  Sugar, Spice, and Everything Nice!  The average length fic has enough for it all- maybe even enough room for some nutmeg if you want…  Anyway I tend to think that the average length is good for minimal build on character.  Now, mind you, I’m not here to tell how fanfictions are supposed to be, but I think that there’s only enough room for a statement at the beginning, then a changed statement at the end.  Nothing wrong with them though!  If you want a story sweet enough to make you giggle, but not so long that your mom walks into your room wondering how freaking long it takes to go to bed, then the average length is perfect.

• Series:  If character building is what you want, then turn to the series!  Actually, I tend to think that series have the most potential:  So much room for tension, release, and surprises!  The only problem with these is that it’s really hard to stay focused on a single topic.  Usually more and more characters are drawn into the series, until boom!   Author-chan explodes with too much fanservice.

Part 3: The spotlight shines…  The light illuminates...  BOOM!  It’s your turn, reader-chan!!!

It’s a popular stereotype that girls love to go shopping.  Sure, shopping for school supplies rock, but clothes shopping?  No thanks.  But this time, reader-chan, you’re not searching for just clothes.  You’re searching for your entire personality!

Note:  I, in no way, got all the personalities that reader-chan can have.  And I also included my opinions in here so yay!

• Common Cold!  Achoo!  Sick!Reader-chan, somebody’s gotta take care of you…  Whether you like it or not.  They won’t calm down until you’re all better, and by then they’ve probably caught whatever you had.

• Seriously Sick!  Like, Ebola!  I shouldn’t be joking but I am anyway!  Sick!Reader-chan’s dying, you need help!  True love might be the key to healing you (*coughcoughcliché*), but usually Sick!Reader-chan has a bittersweet ending…

• Child!  You’ve got character-chan wrapped around your little finger, Child!Reader-chan!  May it be that character-chan is a parent, best friend, or friendly rival, childly cuteness is guaranteed!

• Parent!  Whether you’re the mommy or daddy, your husbando/waifu won’t care!  Caring for your child is number one in importance for both of you.

• Sibling!  Brotherly/sisterly love is so sweet, isn’t it?  At least when you aren’t trying to rip each other’s face off.  

• Sniper!  Aw yeah!  You’re the eagle eye of the team, the one who can make the perfect shot at record speed!

• Hacker!  Working behind the scenes, you can find any bit of info from millions of files.  Everyone is relying on you, Hacker!Reader-chan, to get the job done!

• Spy!  Huehuehue…  Don’t think for a second that you’re safe, character-chan…  Spy!Reader-chan’s got her eye on you.

• Thief/Police!  Either causing crime or suppressing it, Thief/Police!Reader-chan masters it all.  Character-chan is usually your arch enemy, so stay on edge; that burning feeling at the back of your head isn’t your imagination…

• Neko!  Meow!  You’re a cute kitten, Neko!Reader-chan!  Unbeknownst to everyone around you though, you can transform into an even cuter human with neko ears and tail!  Beat that, grumpy cat!

• Inu!  Woof!  Poor Inu!Reader-chan, nobody wants you…  Your doggy ears and tail chase away even the kindest person, until character-chan comes…

• Naga!  Hiss!  (am I seriously going to do this every time?)  You’re a regular human, until you look down…  Uh, where are your legs?  Oh yeah, you’re a Naga!Reader-chan, half snake!  Cool!

• Dragon!  Roar!  (ok, I’m doing this every time) You’re a beauty in the land and the air, Dragon!Reader-chan!  Too bad that character-chan is either a hunter or a dragon rider.  Friendship does come with surprises though….                                                                                                             

• Genderbent!  W-what the?!  I'm a boy/girl!!!

• Shy!  I-I really… I really l-li-like you…  //runs away 

• Depressed!  The world hates me...

• Like, average person!  I think I’m going to be able to go to sleep earlier today!

• Or, you! (and me)  Who needs sleep when you can write fanfiction?

FAQ:  (actually no one has asked me questions so I’m basically making these up)

So?  Why do I need to know this?

So.  Why not?

Wait…  But everyone makes something for themselves.  Are you sure you aren’t trying to sell commissions?

Well…  I am selling commissions.  But…  >.>  If you could buy some that’d be nice…

I read a fanfiction that has a completely different storyline than anything you wrote here.  What?

Those are my favorite fanfictions!  Those with a giant twist without seeming cliche, and with an awesome ending?  Sign me up!